How to use "Conditioning Language" in negotiations.
EXTRACTED FROM PODCAST EPISODE 9 - Luke Tomlinson
In this thought provoking episode of The Negotiation Podcast, we review the concept of “Conditioning Language” and how it plays a crucial role in setting the stage for successful negotiations by strategically shaping the expectations of the other party through the use of language, stories and context right from the start.
The Subtle Power of Conditioning Language
Conditioning language is a powerful yet often overlooked tool in the art of negotiation. It refers to the deliberate use of language, stories, and context to shape the expectations and perceptions of the other party before making a formal proposal. The subtlety of conditioning language is precisely what makes it so influential—it’s at work long before the main negotiation begins, quietly setting the stage for what is to come. We see examples of conditioning language all the time in everyday interactions, advertisements, and professional settings, but we often fail to recognize it until its effects have already taken hold. This unawareness can leave us at a disadvantage, influenced by the language without even realizing it.
What Conditioning Language Means to the Negotiator
For the negotiator, conditioning language is a strategic tool that can significantly impact the outcome of a negotiation. It’s the art of framing the conversation in a way that guides the other party’s expectations and perceptions, often without them even realizing it. By carefully crafting the language used in the early stages of communication, a negotiator can:
1. Set the Tone:
Conditioning language establishes the tone of the negotiation, whether it’s collaborative, competitive, or neutral.
2. Manage Expectations:
It helps in managing what the other party expects to gain or concede during the negotiation.
3. Create a Positive Perception:
Effective conditioning can make a proposal seem more favourable or reasonable, even if it involves compromise.
4. Reduce Resistance:
By subtly aligning the other party’s mindset with your goals, you can reduce resistance to your proposals.
In essence, conditioning language allows the negotiator to influence the negotiation’s direction before the actual bargaining begins, laying a foundation for more favourable outcomes.
How to Prepare Your Conditioning Language
Preparation is key when it comes to using conditioning language effectively. Here are some steps to consider when preparing your conditioning language:
1. Understand Your Audience:
Research the other party’s needs, motivations, and personality style. Are they driven by logic (a ‘Blue’ personality), results (a ‘Red’), creativity (a ‘Yellow’), or harmony (a ‘Green’)? Tailor your language to resonate with their style.
2. Define Your Objectives:
Be clear about what you want to achieve. What are your primary goals, and how can conditioning language help you reach them?
3. Craft Your Message:
Develop language that aligns with your objectives and the other party’s style. Consider how you can frame your proposal in a positive light, focusing on mutual benefits.
4. Anticipate Responses:
Think about how the other party might react to your conditioning language. Prepare to adjust your approach based on their feedback.
5. Practice:
Rehearse your conditioning language in advance. The more natural it feels, the more effective it will be in the negotiation.
How to Practice...
- Select Your Buyer Card or Seller Card with variables that match your desired challenge level.
- Assign an Observer who knows the tactic you are practicing.
- Time your negotiation for 4–6 minutes.
- Practice using the tactic at the right moments during the session.
- Observer provides feedback on when and how the tactic was used as well the overall impact on the negotiation.
- Reflect by spending 3–5 minutes discussing how the tactic influenced the negotiation.
- Repeat so everyone gets a chance to practice the tactic, observe, and negotiate.
Mistakes People Make and the Pitfalls of Conditioning Language
While conditioning language can be a powerful tool, it’s not without its pitfalls. Here are some common mistakes and how to avoid them:
1. Over-Conditioning: Pushing too hard with conditioning language can make you seem manipulative or insincere. It’s important to strike a balance between guiding the conversation and respecting the other party’s autonomy.
• Example of Over-Conditioning: “As a small business, you obviously can’t afford our premium services, so let’s focus on what you can manage.”
• Pitfall: This statement assumes the other party’s financial situation and belittles their capabilities, which could create resentment and mistrust.
2. Assuming One Size Fits All: Not every party will respond to the same type of conditioning language. Tailoring your approach to the specific audience is crucial.
• Example of Misaligned Conditioning: “We’ve structured this deal to ensure maximum efficiency, which is what every client prioritises.”
• Pitfall: If the other party values creativity or flexibility over efficiency, this approach may fail to resonate.
3. Ignoring the Other Party’s Signals: If you don’t pay attention to the other party’s verbal and non-verbal cues, you might miss signs that your conditioning language isn’t working, or worse, is backfiring.
• Example: Continuing to emphasise cost savings when the other party is clearly more interested in quality and innovation.
• Pitfall: This could lead to disengagement or even a breakdown in negotiations if the other party feels misunderstood.
4. Failing to Adapt: Even if you’ve prepared well, real-time negotiation requires flexibility. Sticking rigidly to your pre-planned conditioning language can be a mistake if the situation changes.
• Example: Insisting on a predetermined narrative despite the other party showing clear disinterest.
• Pitfall: This rigidity can make you appear out of touch or unresponsive, weakening your position.
Examples of Good and Bad Conditioning Language
Good Conditioning Language:
• Scenario: A procurement professional negotiating with a supplier on pricing.
• Good Example: “We’re looking to establish a long-term partnership where both parties benefit. While price is important, we’re also focused on quality and consistency, which we know your company excels at.”
• Why It Works: This language is positive, focuses on mutual benefits, and acknowledges the supplier’s strengths, setting a collaborative tone.
Bad Conditioning Language:
• Scenario: The same procurement professional using a different approach.
• Bad Example: “We know your prices are higher than competitors, but we’re willing to consider you if you can match their rates.”
• Why It Fails: This statement starts on a negative note, comparing the supplier unfavourably to competitors and making the negotiation feel more like a concession than a partnership.
Recognising and Mastering Conditioning Language
Conditioning language is a subtle yet powerful tool that plays a critical role in negotiations. Its effectiveness lies in its ability to influence perceptions and expectations before the core negotiation begins. However, its subtlety also means that it often goes unnoticed—until it’s too late, and the conditioning has already shaped the outcome.
For negotiators, mastering conditioning language is essential. It requires preparation, understanding of the audience, and the ability to adapt in real-time. By avoiding common pitfalls and learning to recognise both good and bad conditioning language, negotiators can harness this tool to create more favourable outcomes, build stronger relationships, and ultimately, achieve greater success in their negotiations.
Check Your Knowledge
If you can answer each question, you're already halfway to success!
The next step is simple: just PRACTICE.
What is "conditioning language" in the context of negotiations?
Why is conditioning language considered a powerful tool in negotiations?
How can a negotiator prepare their conditioning language?
What are some common mistakes to avoid when using conditioning language?
What are some examples of good and bad conditioning language?
How can you recognise if conditioning language is being used on you?
Why is practice important when learning to use conditioning language?
How can conditioning language help in achieving better negotiation outcomes?
Practicing at The Negotiation Club
Understanding negotiation tactics and techniques is just the first step because their effective application always require... practice! This is where negotiation clubs or practice groups can be invaluable so JOIN OUR CLUB TODAY (30 Day FREE Trial) :
1. Developing Intuition:
Repeated practice helps you develop a natural feel for when and how to build relationships, making it second nature.
2. Building Confidence:
Practicing in a safe environment boosts your confidence to employ these techniques in real-world situations.
3. Receiving Feedback:
Constructive feedback from peers and trainers helps refine your approach, ensuring you can build relationships effectively without compromising your negotiation goals.
4. Adapting to Situations:
Practice allows you to adapt your techniques to different scenarios and personalities, enhancing your flexibility and effectiveness.
Club Members Feedback Assessment:
During the club meeting a formal "Feedback Assessment Script" helps identify within the zoom transcript the feedback. We can then use this with our AI to summarise the feedback helping to keep a record of the club members progress.
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Script:
- State your name.
- State the name of the negotiator you were observing.
- State the Technique being practiced and what you were specifically looking for.
- Explain what you observed and your specific feedback.
- Finally include a proposed "Level of Achievement" (Level 1, 2 or 3)
Each participant will be assessed on their ability to incorporate the designated tactic. Observers should use the following levels as a guideline:
Level 1
The participant recognises the tactic and attempts to apply it, though inconsistently.
Level 2
The participant integrates the tactic effectively into the negotiation, contributing to the discussion.
Level 3
The participant uses the tactic skilfully, influencing the negotiation outcome or advancing their position meaningfully.